What are some of the wittiest quotations?

Posted: February 25, 2013 in Uncategorized

Answer by Shanthi Swaroop:

"It's not true that I had nothing on. I had the radio on." -Marilyn Monroe.

"All generalizations are false, including this one"

"I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road and not be questioned about their motives."

"Be yourself; everyone else is already taken." -Oscar Wilde

"If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?" -Abraham Lincoln

"I'm a good father because I promise you lots of things. Doing them would make me an excellent father." -Homer Simpson

“You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine'.” -Tommy Cooper

"Insanity is hereditary. You get it from your children" -Sam Levenson

"Every once in a while, I feel like exercising. Whenever this happens, I just lay down and wait till the feeling passes." -Winston Churchill

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